u know that things don't really work for u when:

1. you keep snapping at people even though there's no real need to.
2. you pretend to be nice to people even though u just feel like telling them "fuck off"
3. you just want to sleep yet you are caught between wanting to do your gaming and having to wake up early for work the next day.
4. you are just sick of facing the same damn thing everyday and knowing that u have to face the same damn thing for the next 3 years or so.

sighs. i just want my life back. but, if i have a life, i have no moolahs. sighs. what a simple logic, yet so difficult to grasp. because the mind is willing to work, the heart yearns for another thing. sighs. very tired. very unmotivated.

back to the same thing. i know what i want, yet, i'm facing external pressures to not get what i want. damn.

see, i can just keep complaining about this issue and not do anything about it. and i pray that i can last for 3 years. perhaps, i should seriously consider being a teacher, since, it's still pretty much schooling hours.

i need the money, money, money. i have to constantly remind myself why am i here. money, money, money. i want to travel so bad.... i need money, money, money.

it's interesting how the topics at work remain pretty much the few usual boring ones. love, travel, food and money. oh wells, if i really want to discuss something intellectual, i probably surf the net most of the time and have an internal debate within my brain. yes, things are boring. that's why, it's amazing how i can stay awake. hahaha. perhaps, right now, i should find another job first, so i can quit and still have a life.

sighs. looking forward to my LEAVE!!!