the cny holidays are ending for me today. next, it's gonna be one month of teaching before i have a break. oh wells, at least i'm not dreading to go teaching as compared to the past year, where i have to physically drag myself out of the comforts of my bed. :) teaching full-time now, i can totally get the customer-oriented feel. sighs, everything about business is being customer-oriented. the realities of life. at least, it is easier than audit. would i go back to the corporate industry? it is still too early for me to come to any decision yet. i'm happy where i'm now, guess that's all that matters right now.

many thoughts swirled in my mind during this cny period. mainly to deal with people. the negative thoughts and feelings that i have to a certain cousin always arise during this period. it will take about a week for this unhealthy thoughts to dissipate. sighs. i have always hated this stupid feeling. i guess, it's mainly due to my mom's relentless competitive streak regarding them. however, during this cny, things have changed. i have understood that it's the adults that have created this ridiculous barrier. i can't close this barrier right now, but i have resolved this negative feeling that i have. :) not totally, but most of it. i think, during the next year, same period, i'm able to view things differently.

it's really funny how i'm able to dish out advice for others yet unable to apply the same logic regarding myself. however, we must always think out of context, where, even without the status, we are able to achieve the things we want to. sounds confusing? just a simple example: i have always wanted to see the world, the different environments that people live in. i can achieve that as long as i have the monetary means. this may not be due to my occupational status, but the financial decisions i make in my life. i have to get that occupational status does not equate to financial status. i'm still learning :)

learning, a life-long journey. still learning, regarding relationships. haha, things are certainly not a bed of roses. expectations have changed, and effort less needed as we understand each other more. less compromise have occurred as we understand each others moods and thought processes. well, i believe that as long as we commit and make the effort, anything can last. :)

it really has been a long time since i last blogged :)

i'm wondering how am i able to like my sunday class wholly. haix, i still can't find the excitement for teaching on sundays. perhaps, it's because of that student of mine. argh. teaching piano has it's stress too. since it's a relatively large organisation, i can't do things my own way. to think that they even remind you to be patient to your students =.= oh wells, i'm earning my keep from them, guess some level of conformity is needed?

had the yearly reunion dinner last night. perhaps i'm feeling tired? i don't seem to mind alot about the things that used to bother me. :) guess it's better, as in i save my energy in bothering about unimportant things. however, it also shows that i've matured in some ways. perhaps, understanding who am i, what i want and what i have is more important then some previous generation's rivalry. haha, one thing that doesn't change: when i dislike something/someone, i will just move away from that object. haha, i just don't like u guys. period. :)

getting used to my life and routine right now. :) hopefully, i'll be ready for the exams by next year. my target is this year, to get all my pieces ready, to drill down in technicalities after that. however, the practising right now is harder, having to inculcate many things at once. haha. it's easier to demand that of my students then for myself!! discipline! not a great problem of me, but, must maintain still!

i guess, i choose my wars nowadays. when i see a discussion that i am able to give my 2 cents worth but will lead to a heated argument, i choose to shut up. sometimes, i feel that i've lost the will to fight, but perhaps, i'm just more elitist? i choose the people that i want to speak to. oops, shoot me! but perhaps, i'm more used to like-minded people i guess:)

yay! going to body world tmr! can't wait to spend the day with my dear dear!